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- No reserving loungers - the chair is for SITTING not RESERVING, cunt.
- If you wanna reserve something, call a fuckin' restaurant, cunt.
- Max time to be away from the sunlounger is TWELVE MINUTES unless you are in the pool. This includes: running back to your room to grab something, going to the bar, or taking a shit because you drank alcohol at breakfast time because #holidaylyf, cunt.
- Sunlounger? Hardly know 'er!
- We go on holidays to avoid the rat race - don't make me rat race for a chair, cunt.
- Sunloungers are made for butts, not bags, cunt.
- 'oh - but what if I don't get a chair?!' This is why it's important to follow these rules, so no one misses out, cunt.
- Sunlounger adjacent: poolside waiters are fucking legends and you should treat them as such. Be polite when ya order your nachos, cunt.
